Day 6ix …. Wild in the Aisle.

I have been making quite a few odd mistakes recently, the extreme heat and humidity I believe has been a big player in this term of events.

Once again, my extremely scrambled cerebellum certainly let me down big time earlier today. I thought I noticed a character from my past pushing a shopping trolley around our local branch of Saino’s, some of you may remember from a previous blog, [the big rotund lady with carrot red hair and green finger nails]?. Thinking to myself … after ten years, perhaps I should go and say my thank-you to her, after all she helped me cross all my remaining tee’s and dotted the few i’s i had left in my life at that particular time. I wanted to show her just how well I was and how far that I had come.

Todays society dictates, or it should, in general show a manner of professionalism, honesty and being polite. As I approached *her* I started to falter, was this to be a good idea?  After all, she was a Magistrate, and this was her private time, would she be offended if I broached the subject as I was once, a pile of correspondence in a folder tied with a silk ribbon, as were many of her other cases.  So, In true style and with great aplomb I sidled up to her like a panther, and just as the handsome inquisitive Professor Sycamore would have, I politely asked “Excuse me Madam, I am so sorry to bother you, but is your surname (smith), I think i recognise you?

Bearing in mind, my Mother used to have ‘a certain look’ that she gave me, especially if I had done something wrong, or shut me up before I was about to open my mouth at the wrong moment in time. She did an extremely good impression of Kaa the snake with those spinning hypnotic eyes.

So, here I am, metaphorically speaking, picking myself up off the floor after being power shunted into the shelves, almost as if an evil force had been protecting the invisible cape on the Aerodactyl from a sacred level in a PokémonGo game.

From the look on her face and how the word “NO” was expelled from her mouth, and the venom attached, I can only believe that she was incognito and had realised her identity had now been blown. She knew I was aware it was her.  As I watched her depart, the mist gently cleared from around her feet, she seemed to float over the terrazzo flooring as if on a cloaked hover-board. Holding onto the shopping cart with one hand and whilst certain items on the shelves were jumping into the cart as if committing suicide, my suspicions were confirmed when I saw the wand in her other as the silver tip glistened under the fluorescent light and the shadow of the invisible bats, as they flew about her head.

Q, What has this to do with a picture of my wild flower garden?

A, Anything that looks wild, leave well alone.

 

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